Date: 19 Jul 2009 13:21 Title: A small break in the action at last
There are quite a few inconsistencies in this chapter (and the last one as well) in the beginning of the last chapter, you mentioned about Mrs. Norris bing found and the message ... then why did the same thing happen after the Halloween ball?
Also, Creevy gets petrified twice in this chapter once after the match with Slytherin adn the second time after the duel with Malfoy and his subsequent expulsion ...
Date: 31 Dec 2008 9:17 Title: No more calm, here comes the storm
I liked the way you did this, but you seem to change Hermione's age part way though.
At one point Percy & Dora talk about her, which makes it seem take she is in Percy's year, or maybe Dora's.
Then you refer to her as a secound year with Harry.
It would seem you are get a little mixed up.
But the over story line seems very good.
Keep up the good work.
Looking forward to reading the rest in this line.
Author's Response: What chapter did I refer to her in as a second year with Harry? She is supposed to be in Percy's (and Dora's) year, as Dora is only three years older than Harry in this story, and therefore in Percy's year.
Date: 15 Oct 2008 22:14 Title: No more calm, here comes the storm
interesting re-do story, but I have to wonder, what purpose did changing the ages of Tonks and Hermione serve?
Author's Response: aside from the fact that Hermione always seemed like an "outsider" with Ron and Harry, and I like the "honks" plots, not much.