“It slices, it dices” promised the announcer on the television.
“How do you work this bloody thing anyway” Ron growled. He pressed a few other buttons, and in short order the cellular telephone was on speaker.
“For english, say one. Para espanol diga dos. Orfay igpay atinla, aysay eethray” instructed the mechanized voice who rattled off several other languages in succession.
“I wonder what they’re trying to tell us” Luna wondered aloud.
“To press one if we want english” Harry responded, though not sarcastically.
“Perfect for disemboweling dark wizards” the television continued.
“‘Mione, would you? We need one of those for the Horcrux hunt. You heard them!”
“Harry, please, stop messing with Ron’s mind. There’s not enough there, he might hurt himself” Ginny retorted.r32;
“Hey!” Ron yelled angrily after he realized what Ginny had said.
“Wasn’t me” Harry replied genuinely.
The twins giggled in the corner and Ron drew his wand as if to hex them, but it sailed smoothly into Harry’s hand instead.
“Harry, you remember what happened last summer” Hermione warned.
“And no fair using wandless silent spells on me before I learn them, mate” Ron added.
“What incentive have you to learn them if not to compete with Harry? How’s Harry supposed to practice if not on us and do you think that the death eaters will stop and say ‘well, what spells have you mastered? We wouldn’t want to use something you haven’t perfected yet against you” Hermione retorted.
Ron whined slightly at her comments. They made sense, after all, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.
“and if you call in the next ten minutes we’ll double our offer. That’s right! You’ll get two of our exclusive Shang Su knives for the low price of three easy payments of $19.95 but that’s not all. You’ll get our patented sonic nose hair clippers FREE. That’s right, FREE.”
“Hurry Mione! Where’s your time turner” Ron demanded, diverting her attention from his lack of concession to her statements.
“Merlin” she muttered shifting slightly in the beanbag chair, The television screen went momentarily black, then the picture was in black and white.
“Hey! What’d you do?” Ron yelled.
“Sorry. I must have sat on the remote and changed the channel” she responded in explanation.
“Well, unchange it then” Ron pouted.
The twins were engrossed in the new program that was playing.
“Nuh uh. It’s our turn” Fred commented.
“Turn it up” George ordered.
“No way. This way’s better” Harry exclaimed as he reached under Hermione for the remote.
“Hey! Hands off my girl, mate” Ron yelled.
“I’m just getting the remote” Harry explained.
“I’m not property” Hermione added defensively.
Harry muted the program and started speaking in a gruff voice.
“My sword is bigger than yours.”
“But I know how to use mine. It” Hermione started.
“Slices and dices” the tv finished for her as Ron raised the volume. He had seized the remote from Harry and turned the channel back to the infomercial.
“Hey” the twins chorused. George lunged at his younger brother, claiming the remote for himself as he did. He pressed another button.
“I wore my coat with golden lining” a man belted.
“There Gin. That’s your song. It’s about clothes” Fred teased.
She tossed a pillow at him. He ducked and used his wand to conjure a stream of them directed back at her. After a moment or two, the pillows had been snatched from the air as Dumbledore’s Army gleefully swatted at each other with them. George hit the button again as Hermione cast locking and silencing charms about to insure that her parents wouldn’t awaken from the noise and walk in to see the mess of feathers scattered about the room.
As the youths settled in again and turned back to the television in Hermione’s bedroom, their eyes glossed over.
Several men were kicking a ball on the ground.
“That’s dumb. The ball isn’t even moving? And they aren’t on brooms? Muggle sports are pointless” Neville exclaimed.
George changed the channel again. Several people were singing- elves?
“Munchkins” Hermione explained.
“I am the great and powerful Oz” a voice emanating from the television said.
“Who’s that clown” George asked.
“He’s the Wizard of Oz” Harry explained.
“Wizards don’t look like that” Fred retorted.
“Yeah, Harry. Have you ever seen a wizard that looks like that?” Neville added.
“Not even Tommy’s boys or the snakeman himself is that weird” George stated.
“Muggles don’t know what you guys are like” Harry said.
“Huh? You guys” Ron asked.
Harry realized his mistake. The late hour had caused him to betray his true feelings, that even after six years, he wasn’t sure that the wizarding world was his world.
Hermione came to his aid. “It’s different for us. We didn’t grow up in the wizarding world. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like muggleborns have a place there. As alien as all of this is to all of you, magic is to us. It’s hard to get past the days of schoolyard teasing for believing that magic exists.”
Harry was relieved that she had been able to explain, but wondered if Hermione really felt that way. Everything simply came so easily to her.
“Do they really think all witches are ugly green women with warts on their nose” Ginny asked.
“No” Harry started. “Only the Slytherins.”
Ginny stared at him a moment, then cracked a smile. “Only the Slytherins” she whispered as she fell asleep, her head on his shoulder. She was oblivious to the piercing stares of her three older brothers, but Harry wasn’t. Still, he did nothing to move Ginny, but used his wand to conjure a blanket to stave off the night’s chill.
The other DA members backed away quietly in case the Weasley brothers decided the honour of their sister needed defending, but instead, the boys curled up next to their respective mates. Fred, George and particularly Ron seemed reassured by the sheer volume of people here. They all knew Harry was too shy to attempt anything with this many people, and so they, too, settled in for a good night’s rest before whatever would unfold the next day.
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